STORY 21/50: Motherhood has always been my life’s dream, and it truly is a joy. But motherhood also requires more strength than you ever thought you could possess, and even more when your child needs you to be strong!
I vividly remember when my daughter Kendrah got in the car and said, “Mom, don’t hate me. I’m pregnant.” Initially, I needed a minute to process, but then I jumped into action. I knew my daughter and her baby needed me to be strong. We picked up prenatal vitamins, moved her back home, and made an appointment at a pregnancy center that afternoon! From the moment she told me, my love for her and the baby far outweighed any “disappointment” with the situation.
I took Kendrah to every appointment, poured over adoption family profiles with her, and bought her the foods she craved. I sat with her as she told family and friends, cried, rejoiced, and prayed over every step of the process. We joked that I was her “husband” throughout her pregnancy. And I would do it all again in a heartbeat!
I was very supportive of her decision to make an adoption plan. My older brother was adopted, so I have seen first-hand that adoption is beautiful and life-giving. From the moment we walked in to New Life for the first time—feeling a little nervous and unsure—our social worker was like a breath of fresh air. She was always willing to discuss our concerns and make sure we understood each step.
I remember standing in her office before our first meeting with John and Rachel. It was a mixture of excitement, hope, and nerves. Would they like us? Would we like them? Was this complicated road something we could walk with them?
When I prayed about the decision, God made it clear that He had the perfect parents already hand-picked for this little girl. I had a vision of the adoptive mother—a petite woman with curly, short blonde hair; I couldn’t see her face, but I could sense her kind and tender spirit. When I described the image to my daughter, she said, “That sounds like a kindergarten teacher!” And sure enough, Rachel had short blonde hair that she often wore curly, and she was an art teacher.
God has been in every detail of this process and has exceeded our every expectation. When I thought I couldn’t take the next step, He carried me.
Just thinking about the entrustment ceremony at the hospital brings tears to my eyes. I had encouraged my child to place this beautiful baby girl for adoption, but I truly felt the gravity of the choice that day. Seeing my daughter in intense emotional pain and reassuring her that she made the right decision was heart-wrenching.
But seeing two beautiful mothers, both wanting the best for this little girl, was amazing! Rachel had purchased matching necklaces for Kendrah and the baby. It was the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Being a birth grandmother is wonderful. My granddaughter is perfect in every way! I have loved her deeply since the moment I knew she existed. While giving up my “grandma rights” was difficult, we are forever grateful for how generous John and Rachel have been in sharing her with us.